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Archive for the tag “Lighter Side”

MY MEDICAL EVENTS – KNEE REPLACEMENT!

My last article was a review of medical events over my first 88 years. Well, I will be 88 on August 31st and I have just lived through two more major events in my lengthy life. I had to wait until I could visit with my new Cardiologist yesterday to try to find out what happened..

 

I arrived at Memorial Hospital in Lufkin Texas at 7am Monday June 4th 2018 to get prepped for replacement of my right knee. My Surgeon, DR. Jason Carter, advised me he has shifted a couple of minor surgeries ahead of me and who am I to hurry him up? I just responded to be careful, I was in no hurry as my next probable tee time would be sometime in July.

 

Some time later, I guess it was about midnight on Wednesday, I awoke in Critical Care among total strangers, hungry and a sore right knee. I remember people discussing therapy, heart monitor surgery. My number one objective was to make sure I was to have therapy at the hospital in Hemphill. My planning was extremely detailed to match plans to care for my wife, Norma. I Was quite confused as to why I was still in Lufkin instead of Hemphill.

 

As I became cognizant my fear was lack of therapy on my new knee. Being in Critical Care established priorities based on crisis and my poor knee was not a priority.

 

My best guess is a Pacemaker was installed on Sunday evening, June 10th. This was a procedure that reminded me on my years working on Space Programs for NASA. The people were awesome as they performed about three hours of tedious operations as a team, well prepared and with flawless precision. I felt like a “Chicken on a Stick’ being roasted up in the air suspended.

 

I was excited that I might get moved on Monday to the hospital in Hemphill but the news was horrible. The Pacemaker had a loose wire and it required a new Device be installed Monday evening that took another 3 hours.

 

The testing required Tuesday was successful and after a long talk with the Cardiologists they approved moving me to the Hemphill Hospital.

 

They would not let me ride in the car with my son for reasons they would not explain and I was running a week behind my desired tee time schedule because I now have a Pacemaker.

 

The ambulance ride from Lufkin to Hemphill was an event never to be forgotten. I Just thought I was stabilized for the ride of a lifetime. We arrived physically about 4 pm but it was at least 8pm before my mind arrived.

 

I had two days of therapy before my golf friends came to visit on Friday afternoon. I was still trying to reconstruct the events that happened in Lufkin when I was notified I would be returning to Lufkin Tuesday Morning to visit with the Surgeon and the Cardiologists. I was scared that it would require another ambulance ride and ecstatic when I found out I could use my car and whoever I desired to drive me both directions.

 

My friend Tim “T” Picked me up about 9:30 Tuesday morning for the first appointment with Dr. Jason Carter. They X-Rayed my knee, advised me the new knee was doing great and the nurse proceeded to remove the staples from my knee. As the Surgeon had completed his work before anything happened connected to the Pacemaker I still had no clue what caused the Pacemaker.   

 

We proceeded to our next appointment with the Cardiologists who had visited with me and was instrumental in the Pacemaker I am wearing today. They ran another EKG and spent a long time with paperwork.

 

I asked the Doctor if he knew why I got the Pacemaker. He told me he was on duty in the ER on the 4th. He said he was summoned to ICU where I was located and I had fallen out of the bed and was lying on the floor. He said I was not coherent and I am sure I may will likely never know what happened or why I now wear the Device?

 

My stay continues in the Swing Bed re-hab program at Sabine County Hospital. We are so fortunate to have our hospital managed and manned by caring and professional Doctors, Nurses and the support staff of Healthcare Professionals. This program allows my family to care for my wife Norma while I am being prepared for my new “Bionic” phase of life. The story will continue.

 

My beautiful Bride and I will celebrate 58 years of marriage tomorrow, June 23rd.

 

Clyde Brewer

WE ARE AWESOME !!! 

To all of us Born 1925 – 1955:  

After a walk through history read a quote by Jay Leno.

First, we survived being born to mothers who may have smoked and/or drank while they were pregnant. 

They took aspirin, ate blue cheese dressing, tuna from a can, and didn’t get tested for diabetes. 

Then, after that trauma, we were put to sleep on our tummies in baby cribs Covered with bright colored Lead-based paints. 

We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, locks on doors or cabinets, And, when we rode our bikes, We had baseball caps, Not helmets, on our heads. 

As infants and children, we would ride in cars with no car seats, no booster seats, no seat belts, no air bags, bald tires and sometimes no brakes. 

Riding in the back of a pick- up truck on a warm day was always a special treat. 

We drank water from the garden hose and not from a bottle. 

We shared one soft drink with four friends, from one bottle, and no one actually died from this. 

We ate cupcakes, white bread, real butter, and bacon. We drank Kool-Aid made with real white sugar.

And we weren’t overweight.

WHY? 

Because we were always outside playing…that’s why! 

We would leave home in the morning and play all day, as long as we were back when the streetlights came on. 

No one was able to reach us all day. And, we were OKAY. 

We would spend hours building Our go-carts out of scraps and then ride them down the hill, Only to find out We forgot the brakes. After running into the bushes a few times, we learned To Solve the problem. 

We did not Have Play Stations, Nintendo’s and X-boxes.

There were No video games, No 150 channels on cable, No video movies Or DVDs, No surround-sound or CDs, No cell phones, No personal computers, No Internet and No chat rooms. 

WE HAD FRIENDS 

And we went outside and found them!  We fell out of trees, got cut, Broke bones and Teeth, And there were No lawsuits  from those accidents.

We would get Spankings with wooden spoons, switches, ping-pong paddles, or just a bare hand and no one would call child services to report abuse.

We ate worms and mud pies made from dirt, And The worms did Not live in us forever. 

 We were given BB guns for our 10th birthdays, 22 rifles for our 12th, rode horses, made up games with sticks and tennis balls, and although we were told it would happen – we did not put out very many eyes. 

We rode bikes or walked to a friend’s house and knocked on the door or rang the bell, or just Walked in and talked to them.

Little League had tryouts And not everyone Made the team.  Those who didn’t had to learn To deal with Disappointment. 

Imagine that!! The idea of a parent bailing us out If we broke the law was unheard of. They actually sided with the law!

These generations have produced some of the best risk-takers, Problem solvers, and Inventors ever. 

The past 60 to 85 years have seen an explosion of innovation and new ideas.

We had freedom, Failure, success, responsibility, and we learned How to deal with it all. 

If YOU are one of those born Between 1925-1955, CONGRATULATIONS! 

You might want to share this with others who have had the luck to grow up as kids before the lawyers and the government regulated so much of our lives for our own good. 

While you are at it, forward this to your kids, so they will know how brave and lucky their parents were. 

Kind of makes you want to run through the house with scissors, doesn’t it? 

~~~~~~~ 

The quote of by Jay Leno: 

“With hurricanes, tornados, fires out of control, mud slides, flooding, severe thunderstorms tearing up the country from one end to another, and with the threat of bird flu and terrorist attacks, are we sure this is a good time to take God out of the Pledge of Allegiance?”

For those of you that prefer to think that we lived with just dumb luck go ahead and just delete this message. God was watching over those of us when we made our own choices and “We Survived“!    ANON

My friend Peter Forrest sent this walk through history that brought back many fond memories and pain of being born on August 31, 1930. I am certain my children have never believed many of the stories I shared but I had no reason to make up things like the only bone I ever broke was bowling. They would have never survived the Navy boot camp I endured at age 17. Fear of paying for pain I was one of few who spent nearly five years in the Navy and never got a tattoo. My thanks to Peter for making me at least feel “Awesome”!   C Brewer WOW, today is my 87th birthday too.

I’M BACK, AFTER SOME MIND REPAIR!

It was amazing to see so many comments on the Facebook entry of my last article, “Closed for Repairs”. I really appreciate the few friends that seemed to be concerned if was quitting my writing. I just visited my WordPress site after a week of respite and was shocked that the “Closed for Repairs” posting was the number one article viewed by the world. An article that did not have a single word intriguing connotations. The fact that everyone who was interested in reading nothing was an American. How would you perceive this phenomenon? 

During the same period not one person viewed my article on the healthcare debacle. That is sad news that more Americans are interested in nothing than the health care issues. This coupled with the obvious fact that the Senate also does not care proves that idiocracy is out of control.  When some hate filled Republicans led by John McCain, two “Dizzy” females and some other Senators who exhibit mental problems voted with 100% with the Democrats to kill the healthcare work was saddening. Supporting the Democrats because they despise the President shows it is time to drain the “Senate Swamp”. The hate filled vote made it clear that the Senate and has no concern for the people suffering from Obummercare. Folks next year we can rid Congress of several Senators who voted to keep Obamacare.  

I deeply enjoyed my respite from watching the daily news. After a few days with reruns of Mash, Lucy & Desi, Maude and other oldies and it was mind refreshing. It is a crying shame that the illegals, African Americans, Millennials or Generation Y misfits have zero knowledge of a time when Americans actually liked each other.

As it has rained for the last two days and golf was not possible I watched the news again this morning. It is obvious the media like Congress have forgotten the healthcare issues. It was a small surprise to learn that Senate Majority leader, Mitch McConnell, took time away from his 24 day vacation to express that the President expects too much activity from the Senate. Folks this is the most obvious admission of how the “Swamp” hates Trump and the Senate is overworked. It would be refreshing to know how many people who read this article agree that Congress is “Overworked”?

Other news revealed that Mueller’s “Witch Hunt” has expanded to dig into some individual’s history hoping to discover if they ever “Jaywalked” or sipped Russian Vodka?

It was refreshing to note that Trump’s warning to North Korea was disturbing to Senator Feinstein as provoking the enemy. I expect that her staff was tired of the August vacation and woke her up to get some face time on TV. After all, the people may forget her while she is vacationing. I served in the US Navy during the Korean War nearly 70 years ago. News clips this morning showed Presidential warnings to North Korea from John Kennedy, Ronald Reagan, Bill Clinton, George Bush to stop their nuclear ambitions. No one slowed them down. They made great advancements while Obama courted the Muslim world and dismantled our military and nuclear capability. Now they threaten an atomic attack and who cares? The United States should have wiped them out when I was in the military. Congress is now having a 24 day vacation. America would be better off if all 100 Senators would just resign.

The most repeated news today is 1,000,000 news clips of North Korean leaders prancing and pictures of missile launches. I can never expect to see programs on TV that show harmony like I enjoyed as a boy and younger man. So I just decided to watch reruns of “Blue Bloods” and admire Tom Selleck, my TV and movie hero. I could not find any John Wayne movies and admire my oldest hero. He has already reached the age I will be on the 31st, 87 and hoping. I am praying that it will not rain in the morning so I can leave my Lazy Boy and fire up my golf cart.

I doubt many will read this but it allowed me to escape watching the news for an hour. I think I will go grocery shopping and let Norma watck NCIS reruns.    

C Brewer  

UNUSUAL FACTS!

The Coyote Principle!

My thanks to Ron Jenkins for sharing this scenario of what would actually happen under conditions described. Everyone needs a break from watching the main stream media distort the truth in every news report. The Dis-United States can be united again if we replaced all 535 Congresspersons, 889 Federal Judges and eliminated several Federal agencies, privatized all Governmental operations that have been unionized and made Lobbying a crime. Enjoy the following story. C Brewer   

The Governor of California is jogging with his dog along a nature trail. A coyote jumps out and attacks the Governor’s dog, then bites the Governor.

The Governor starts to intervene, but reflects upon the movie “Bambi” and then realizes he should stop because the coyote is only doing what is natural.

He calls animal control. Animal Control captures the coyote and bills the state $200 testing it for diseases and $500 for relocating it.

He calls a veterinarian. The vet collects the dead dog and bills the State $200 testing it for diseases.

The Governor goes to hospital and spends $3,500 getting checked for diseases from the coyote and on getting his bite wound bandaged.

The running trail gets shut down for 6 months while Fish & Game conducts a $100,000 survey to make sure the area is now free of dangerous animals.

The Governor spends $50,000 in state funds implementing a “coyote awareness program” for residents of the area.

The State Legislature spends $2 million to study how to better treat rabies and how to permanently eradicate the disease throughout the world.

The Governor’s security agent is fired for not stopping the attack. The state spends $150,000 to hire and train a new agent with additional special training re the nature of coyotes.

PETA protests the coyote’s relocation and files a $5 million suit against the state.

Meanwhile in TEXAS.          

The Governor of Texas is jogging with his dog along a nature trail.

A coyote jumps out and attacks his dog.

The Governor shoots the coyote with his state-issued pistol and keeps jogging.

The Governor has spent $.50 on a .45 ACP hollow point cartridge.

The buzzards eat the dead coyote and the governor’s dog.

And that, my friends, is why California is broke and Texas is not. 

“Peace is that brief glorious moment in history, when everybody stands around reloading”      ANON

JUDGES AND BUREAUCRATS GONE MAD!

This is the first time I have never published two articles the same day but the idiotic action of two more Federal Judges to act as they were elected President  is too much. Our Nation is doomed when these two ill informed political quacks can ignore our written laws to enact political decisions that could cause danger to the people. These are the most dangerous decisions made openly by uninformed power hungry individuals in my lifetime. I may be the only American alive that is upset but I will speak my piece before these over paid tyrants rule that “Free Speech” is against their laws.

Congress authorizes a set number of Federal judge positions, or judgeship’s, for each court level. Since 1869, Congress has authorized 9 positions for the Supreme Court. As of 2007, it had authorized 179 court of appeals judgeship’s and 678 district court judgeship’s.

Folks we are now witnessing a takeover of the United States Government by a band of 886 supposedly impartial appointees approved to serve as Judges in a Court of Law. We are only allowed to have one President, one Vice President and 565 individuals who have been elected as Congresspersons.

In the past month we have witnessed a takeover of our Government by a group of unelected Progressive Judges who have no intelligence knowledge related to decisions they are making that have and could cause terror attacks by our enemies.

They are making safety decisions on request from Progressive Groups that usurp the Constitutional authority granted to the President based on intelligence that these Judges have no clearance to even know the dangers. This is like playing Russian Roulette with the Judge who is pointing the loaded gun at your and my head and with no danger of hitting him or herself. If they would play this game with the American Communists Lawyers Union (ACLU) who would even care.

We have a Supreme Court of the land that sits on its “Robed Asses” as does nothing to stop this idiotic waste of time, money and possible loss of innocent American lives. Worse we have a Congress that could act immediately to stop this desire for a Judge to get face time in the Media that promotes this nonsense.

Congress would take so long today to declare war with an enemy that they would still be arguing, they like to use the word debating, or would probably be on the golf course or the local bars when the enemy raised their flag over the US Capitol building.

We the people elected a new President to stop this nonsense. Those noted above along with the thousands of Government employees who are breaking laws to stop the President have met their match. These spoiled, whining, overpaid, under-worked assholes better cinch up their big girl panties, go to work and shut up. In reality most of them do not have the intelligence to see the bulldozer coming so “Saddle Up Buttercup” and get your resume current. As the majority of them are lawyers I doubt if there are as many ambulances to chase as there are Lawyers?

Watching our own people hate each other is worse than rabies. What is happening today is we are our own enemy and is the worst event to happen in my 86+ years. Wake up Americans unless you really hope our Republic will self-destruct. I would like all 886 Federal Judges to run for President and all of them win. This would cancel their lifetime appointments and maybe save the Republic. If we could do the same thing and get rid of all 585 Congresspersons at one time it we could pay off the national debt. Let the States manage themselves and half of them will go belly up. Even Mexico would not want California again.     

They will try to kill Trump but they better have a solid plan. The new Sheriff is able, capable and aimed in the right direction. A message to all of you who are trying to sink the Trump boat. If you get squashed in the process, the term most used to describe your mindset is “STUPID”. It might take anyone else a lifetime to stop the hate in America. Watch Trump do it in less than four years and change the laws and procedures that permit Government Employees to drop anchor instead of row the boat.

Go Navy!

C Brewer

GUN CONTROL – FOR DEMOCRATS?

My good friend Allan Moore shared this collection of factual events in history that prove the provided solution is necessary. Posting this right before the 2016 Demoncratic Convention seemed timely as they are screaming gun elimination. They must keep a log of Demoncrats killed by Demoncrats and just in the Chicago area alone figures scare the crap out of Hillary and her band of thieves.

Enjoy this collection of events that seem to indicate and actually prove that Demoncrats have a problem. The real thing that bothers the Clintons is that most of the deaths in Chicago and other big cities are actually Demoncrats that vote. The number is so big they can’t keep up with deaths fast enough to make sure they will still vote in November. They are also short on people as the paid Demoncratic agitators are still in Cleveland jails and they need more people to work the graveyards registering voters nationwide.

FACTS

In 1865, a Democrat shot and killed Abraham Lincoln, President of the United States.

In 1881, a left wing radical Democrat shot James Garfield, President of the United States – who later died from the wound.

In 1963, a radical left wing socialist shot and killed John F. Kennedy, President of the United States.

In 1975, a left wing radical Democrat fired shots at Gerald Ford, President of the United States.

In 1983, a registered Democrat shot and wounded Ronald Reagan, President of the United States.

In 1984, James Hubert, a disgruntled Democrat, shot and killed 22 people in a McDonalds restaurant.

In 1986, Patrick Sherrill, a disgruntled Democrat, shot and killed 15 people in an Oklahoma post office.

In 1990, James Pough, a disgruntled Democrat, shot and killed 10 people at a GMAC office.

In 1991, George Hennard, a disgruntled Democrat, shot and killed 23 people in a Lubys cafeteria in Killeen, TX.

In 1995, James Daniel Simpson, a disgruntled Democrat, shot and killed 5 coworkers in a Texas laboratory.

In 1999, Larry Asbrook, a disgruntled Democrat, shot and killed 8 people at a church service.

In 2001, a left wing radical Democrat fired shots at the White House in a failed attempt to kill George W. Bush, President of the US.

In 2003, Douglas Williams, a disgruntled Democrat, shot and killed 7 people at a Lockheed Martin plant.

In 2007, a registered Democrat named Seung – Hui Cho, shot and killed 32 people in Virginia Tech.

In 2010, a mentally ill registered Democrat named Jared Lee Loughner, shot Rep. Gabrielle Giffords and killed 6 others.

In 2011, a registered Democrat named James Holmes, went into a movie theater and shot and killed 12 people.

In 2012, Andrew Engeldinger, a disgruntled Democrat, shot and killed 7 people in Minneapolis.

In 2013, a registered Democrat named Adam Lanza, shot and killed 26 people in a school in Newtown, CT.

As recently as Sept 2013, an angry Democrat shot 12 at a Navy ship yard.

In 2016, the Orlando night club shooter was a registered democrat.

Clearly, there is a problem with Democrats and guns.

Not one NRA member, Tea Party member, or Republican conservative was involved in any of these shootings and murders.

SOLUTION:

It should be illegal for Democrats to own guns.

We don’t need gun control, we need Democrat control. Guns don’t kill people, Democrats do!                       ANON

JOB CREATION IDEAS

I received this from a friend and it seems like a great idea. I decided to post it as a public service. As our government has no idea how to help create industry jobs this may accidently be read by the CIA or NSA and a secret agent who can turn in a suggestion and be rewarded for these job creating ideas.

The government would then set up a new agency and hire 100,000 new people to read blogs for ideas on how to create jobs. Then they will tax the blogs to pay for the 100,000 new jobs they created and I would be paying to share my ideas free. What a cycle I have imagined. Anyone agree? I am leaving tomorrow for a week at the beach with 32 of my family and friends. I need to recharge my batteries and prepare for the political conventions. By then Mitt Romney will have 100 more people running for President to make sure Trump is beaten by Hillary. She must have promised him a seat on the Supreme Court to serve with Bill Clinton, Eric Holder, Bill Ayres and Al Sharpton. C Brewer

DIALING 1-800 FOR HELP

The gas company serving my area brought their call center back to Phoenix from India last year after numerous customer complaints. What a difference now when you call them…and it created 300 jobs. I know this works because they were so bad that when India answered I wouldn’t even deal with them. I’d simply ask to be transferred to a rep. in the U.S. and they would comply.

Now that I know it is the LAW – I will do it for sure.

Any time you call an 800 number (for a credit card, banking, Verizon, health and other insurance, computer help desk, etc.) and you find that you’re talking to a foreign customer service representative (perhaps in India, Philippines, etc.), please consider doing the following.

After you connect and you realize that the customer service representative is not from the USA (you can always ask if you are not sure about the accent), please, very politely, say, “I’d like to speak to a customer service representative in the United States”.

The individual might suggest talking to his/her manager, but, again, politely say, “Thank you, but I’d like to speak to a customer service representative in the USA.”

YOU WILL BE IMMEDIATELY CONNECTED TO A REP IN THE USA. That’s the rule and the LAW.

It takes less than one minute to have your call re-directed to the USA.

Tonight when I got redirected to a USA rep, I asked again to make sure – and yes, she was from Fort Lauderdale.

Imagine what would happen if every US citizen insisted on talking to only US phone reps from this day forward? Imagine how that would ultimately impact the number of US jobs that would need to be created.

If I tell 100 people to consider doing this and you tell 100 people to consider doing this – see what I mean… it becomes an exercise in Viral Marketing 101!

Remember:

The goal here is to restore jobs back here at home – not to be abrupt or rude to a foreign phone rep. You may even get correct answers, good advice, and solutions to your problems.

If you agree, please tell 100 people you know, and ask them to tell 10o people they know….etc…Most of the time you can’t understand the foreign rep anyway!!

“The problems we face today are because the people who work for a living are now outnumbered by those that vote for a living.

ANON

Unfortunately this will be federalized and another government agency will be created. They will provide “Customer Service” for that gas company at ten times the costs charged using people in India and Pakistan. Our government will then hire another 100,000 people from Syria and Iraq that we can’t understand, but they vote for Demoncrats.

Anyone agree I need a week with my grandkids? CB

A.A.A.D.D.- KNOW THE SYMPTOMS!

Thank goodness there’s a name for this disorder. Age-Activated Attention Deficit Disorder.

This is how it manifests:

I decide to water my garden. As I turn on the hose in the driveway, I look over at my car and decide it needs washing.

As I start toward the garage, I notice mail on the porch table that I brought up from the mail box earlier. I decide to go through the mail before I wash the car.

I lay my car keys on the table, put the junk mail in the garbage can under the table,
and notice that the can is full.

So, I decide to put the bills back on the table and take out the garbage first.

But then I think, since I’m going to be near the mailbox may as well pay the bills first. I take my check book off the table, and see that there is only one check left.

My extra checks are in my desk in the study, so I go inside the house to my desk where I find the can of Pepsi I’d been drinking .

I’m going to look for my checks, but first I need to push the Pepsi aside so that I don’t accidentally knock it over.

The Pepsi is getting warm, and I decide to put it in the refrigerator to keep it cold. As I head toward the kitchen with the Pepsi, a vase of flowers on the counter catches my eye–they need water.

I put the Pepsi on the counter and discover my reading glasses that I’ve been searching for all morning. I decide I better put them back on my desk, but first I’m going to water the flowers.

I set the glasses back down on the counter, fill a container with water and suddenly spot the TV remote someone left it on the kitchen table.

I realize that tonight when we go to watch TV, I’ll be looking for the remote, but I won’t remember that it’s on the kitchen table, so I decide to put it back in the den where it belongs,

But first I’ll water the flowers. I pour some water in the flowers, but quite a bit of it spills on the floor.

So, I set the remote back on the table, then, I head down the hall trying to
Remember what I was planning to do.

At the end of the day, the car isn’t washed, the bills aren’t paid, there is a warm can of Pepsi sitting on the counter, the flowers don’t have enough water, there is still only 1 check in my check book, I can’t find the remote, I can’t find my glasses, and I don’t remember what I did with the car keys.

Then, when I try to figure out why nothing got done today, I’m really baffled because I know I was busy all day, and I’m really tired.

I realize this is a serious problem, and I’ll try to get some help for it, but first I’ll check my e-mail..

Do me a favor. share this message to everyone you know,because I don’t remember who I’ve sent it to.

Don’t laugh — if this isn’t you yet, your day is coming! I don’t remember who sent it to me, so if it was you, let me know and I will give you credit.

Thanks to my friend Dr. Forrest for providing a name for this aging process. You would think someone would make a pill to help but the pill makers are too young to understand.  C Brewer 

Governmentium

Read the entire article before you see if you agree with the conclusions 
– An exciting discovery!!!
 
Oxford University researchers have discovered the heaviest element yet known
to science. The new element, Governmentium (symbol=Gv), has one neutron, 25
assistant neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons and 198 assistant deputy neutrons,
giving it an atomic mass of 312.

These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are
surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called pillocks.
 
Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert. However, it can be
detected, because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into
contact.
 
A tiny amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction that would normally take
less than a second, to take from 4 days to 4 years to complete.
 
Governmentium has a normal half-life of 2 to 6 years. It does not decay, but
instead undergoes a reorganisation in which a portion of the assistant
neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places. This process is known as an
election
 
In fact, Governmentium’s mass will actually increase over time, since each
reorganisation will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes.

This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to believe that
Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a critical concentration.

This hypothetical quantity is referred to as a critical morass. When
catalysed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium (symbol=Ad), an
element that radiates just as much energy as Governmentium, since it has
half as many pillocks but twice as many morons.

My special thanks to my great friend Baxter Henderson who lives in Melbourne Australia for sharing this assessment that appears to an analysis of the United States government in action? You can decide.  I hope this made you smile and see how screwed up our entire government has become. C Brewer

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